Chapter 2: A glimmer of hope

I've imagined myself countless times walking out of the orphanage gates,feeling the sun on my face and the wind in my hair.

I imagined myself finding a job, making real friends and starting a whole new life of my own. But there's one more thing, I've always wanted to see the face of the woman who abandoned me even as an infant

And until I hear the story of how I was abandoned by the mother superior as my 20th birthday present as she had promised,I won't know what to feel about her yet.

The unfortunate part of living in the orphanage is that my roommates in the dormitory are the ones who bullies me. As I was deep in my own imaginations, they noticed my distraction and their taunts grew sharper "Hey miss ITK, what are you doing huh? What are you up to now? You think you're all that huh, no one is ever gonna come for you until you're sent out of this place."they'd sneer.

But I refused to let them pierce my armour.My days turned into weeks,weeks into months and just like that I counted down to five, four to three more months to go

The next day, as I walked down the narrowed dark hallway, my eyes fixed on the scuffed linoleum floor.

I learned to avoid eye contact to blend into the background,but it didn't always work.My feet led me to the orphanage library where I stumbled on many dusty books,and one of them caught my eyes.It was against the rules to go to the library when it's not time for the library.

But I sneaked in somehow and amidst the dusty books,I felt like I found solace in the words and stories of strong women who overcame adversities.

I'd read stories in the library till dusk, and when I finished for the day I'd sneak out without anyone noticing. I did it for days and finally let go of my worries and anxiety for the time being.

Months passed by,and I had three more to go, even though it felt like an eternity. But I was so determined to stay focused.

Despite the tediousness of my daily routine,I found ways to occupy myself. I'd read books from the library,draw and write in my journal.

I also tried making friends with other girls in the orphanage but it was hard,then I gave up because they all seemed to have their own cliques and social circles.

I told myself "I don't really have to fit in as long as I stay focused on my goal."